I fucking hate trying to lose weight!
I have showed up at the gym more this year than ever. Like for real.
Yet when I wake every morning I feel like hulk is trying to push out of my skin. Everything feels sore and swollen. I feel thicker with each sunrise and I don't understand. I drink so much water now. No soda. Occasion juice if it is all natural. I even cut out sparkling water.
Everyday I am sad to wake and sad to eat. I truly hate myself for eating but can't figure out how to sustain energy without eating.
The month of March had found me pushing harder at the gym. Heavier weight, keeping on plan and what I thought was killing it on the elliptical. All for nothing.
Of course I have weak moments eating. But I track each day. See where I went wrong and correct. Compared to last year. I have cut out SO MUCH fast food and sugars. There should be at least a minute Iota of change. But fucking nothing. I hate this life. 😣😢
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